Barrelow I
by Charlett
Summary: Saphir smiles widely.  He has made a robot.  It is called Barrelow I.  He loves his robot.  Peony does not.  Oneshot, Minor Spoilers


I really wanted to write something because if I didn't I probably would never write again (Final Fantasy IX and Osu! Tatakae! Ouendan! has stolen my souuuuuuul...). So once again, I ask my friend Noirrac what to write and after bouncing around ideas from LARGOxDIST LOL to stuff that ISN'T crack, she said to write about Saphir and his first attempt at ROBOTICS. Because we love Barrelow.

So here it is. LOVE IT. NOW. GRRR...

Read on!

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It was quiet in Keterburg. Snow liked to steal all the sound so whatever people did say hardly got past their mouths and the only sound noticeable amongst the people outside was the crunching of feet in the white, white snow.

That was why it was extremely noticeable when Professor Nebilim's small boarding school effectively exploded. It wasn't really surprising, just noticeable. The youngest member of the school rushed from the smoking house, coughing and sobbing about her lungs. Next came the young heir to the Malkuth throne, Peony, and lastly, Jade, who smacked the prince's hand when he got too close to Jade's sister.

"What was that?" Nephry asked, coughing and sobbing about smoke in her eyes.

"It wasn't you, huh Jade?" Peony asked. The young boy didn't reply; instead he stared at the school. Eventually, Nebilim emerged from the house as well, dragging a young man close behind him.

"Saphir Wyon Nies, you are in deep trouble, young man…" The professor said with a hiss. The boy she was speaking to didn't seem to notice the impending trouble he was in for.

"Did you see?" He said with a grin, looking at Jade, "Did you see, Jade? It was like… 'KABOOM!' You like exploding things, right? Right?" The other child stared silently back at Saphir. Apparently the silver haired child didn't realize that his idol didn't like explosions unless HE started them.

"What were you doing, Saphir?" Nephry asked, smiling at her classmate. Nephry seemed to be the only one who treated Saphir like a peer rather than a retarded puppy. The young boy turned to her, his face showing exactly what he felt: he wished that JADE asked him that question… Nevertheless, Saphir straightened up and smiled brightly.

"I did it!" He said with a smile as Nebilim let the children speak. She had to return to the school and check on the damage, "I finally did it!"

"Did what?" Peony asked, "You've been stuck in your room for a long time. What were you doing in there, anyway?"

"Well…" Saphir looked at Jade, who didn't seem to be interested at all. With a sigh, the boy continued, "I…! I made a robot!"

Peony and Jade looked at each other, asking each other silently whether or not to beat the kid for ruining their day for a measly robot that was probably melting in the heat of the explosion. Nephry blinked at Saphir as he smiled at Jade, his eyes bright and wide as a deer staring into headlights. She smiled and placed her hands behind her back, "That sounds… great, Saphir," She said with less enthusiasm than she had desired, "Where is it?"

"It's back inside. Jade, come with me! I want to show you!" Saphir proclaimed. Jade turned and stared at Saphir, as if to say "You're kidding, right?"

"How about we all go together?" Nephry said, "Look, the smoke is clearing out of the house!"

Peony grumbled, but since Nephry had come up with the idea, he followed closely behind her with a grin on his face. Jade glared at the prince, "Alright," Peony replied, "Let's go look at it together."

So they did.

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The three children stared. The tiny creation on the soot infested floor turned slightly. A small puff of smoke appeared from a two pipes that were in its shoulders. The robot lifted one of its bipedal legs. It moved forward and placed said foot on the floor. It had moved a fraction of an inch forward.

"Isn't it beautiful…?" Saphir cooed like a mother hen, "Hello, Barrelow I. How are you today?"

The robot turned, its waist was one axel that allowed it to turn 360 degrees. Barrelow I looked up at the child, and began to speak, "Fzzzt He…he…hello fzzz gsvr ,r pm m…master. Goooooshuuuuuuuu…" It twitched and Saphir's eyes widened in horror as it slumped forward and proceeded to shut down.

"Nooo!!" He shouted, dropping to the floor and performing emergency maintenance. Jade looked at Peony, who shrugged as Saphir stuffed an oily wrench in his mouth without thinking so he could use finer, tinier tools on the robot. He then realized said wrench was oily and spat it out with a cry. Nephry stared in mute rapture at the almost comic display, and finally Saphir stood up again.

"There!" He said with a smile, "That aught to do it! Hello, Barrelow I. How are you today?"

Barrelow I looked up again, its arms rising into the air, "Hellow Master-er-er-er. Good Morning. I am… am… am… am…" Saphir knelt down and flicked its head with his index finger, "am… am doing fine… Th-th-thank you."

"That certainly is… amazing, Saphir…" Nephry said, kneeling down to look at the robot, "Hello, Barrelow I…"

"B-b-b-b-b-bugger off, snit," The robot hissed. Nephry took a step back with a sniffle and Peony stepped forward, enraged.

"You take that back, you little piece of scrap!"

"G…gain some Fzzzt weight, N-n-n-n-aaaaaaaancy Boy," The robot replied while turning around fully on its waist-axis.

"That's it!" Peony drew his leg back and Saphir gave a shout. Barrelow I went sailing across the room from a well aimed kick, and the robot slid down the wall and it screeched in anger.

"Th…th…-ba-ba-ba-baaaaastaaaa--!!" The creation shot sparks all over the place and Saphir rushed to tend to it. Barrelow I shut down and the boy began some more maintenance.

"You moron!" He screamed, turning to glare angrily at Peony, "You killed him!"

"It's not a 'HE'!" Peony shouted back, "and it was a jerk! Make a better robot, idiot!"

The two began to bicker and Nephry rushed from the room. Jade shook his head and followed her as the boys leapt at each other and tore at each others' hair, punched each others' arms, and kicked each others' shins. They only stopped when Nebilim was brought in by Nephry. The professor had to separate the two and for disobedience, they were the ones who got to clean up the soot infested house.

The two glared at each other the entire time as they worked. Jade licked his finger and turned the page of one of his books, and Nephry played happily with her dolls. It seemed like a normal day at Nebilim's boarding school.

Barrelow was recreated a total of ten times, the last one died more excitedly than all the others beforehand. Saphir was never able to make one that Jade actually liked. Perhaps it was all for the best…

The End

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